Friday, November 30, 2007

To Daddy



Today was my father's birthday. He would have been 98 this year. He died a mature man of 67. Hardly a long life. Hardly enough time to enjoy the years ahead. Hardly enough time to learn who this mamma's man/boy was back then, and certainly not enough time for me to fully appreciate what he was and what he did for me.

Growing up in rural Michigan, my dad was the fourth son of a family of eight. He was the second one born here in the states. Back in Holland, where my grandfather was from, they were gardeners, caretakers. Here in America, they became farmers.

I'm certain he never understood me, a somewhat wild, free-spirited 60s/70s kid. I just wish sometimes, that he could have lived to see the man I've become. Although he's been gone for over 30 years, I probably feel closer to him now that I'm 50 than I did when I was 20. I know I understand him much more, too.

Happy birthday, dad.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Weekend Upgayt

Dear F,

Clever enough title, if not entirely original. But, it about sums up my weekend--a whirlwind of events, some fun, some sad, but basically a good time. Hope yours was also--except for the sad part. Geez, that Chrysler 300 you rented sounded like fun (especially when you read what I rode in).

We got into Chicago around 5 on Friday, and met up with a friend (J) of my neighbor. He hosted us for dinner and is a marvelous fella, if a little ADHD, in my humble opinion. I think the D also stands for Drama. He's also an amateur/pro photographer and we ended up taking a lot of tasteful pics, which will be heretofore featured across my profile as I take up my new quest to find the man-o-my-dreams.

Anyway, I digress. My friend R and I and J then made it out to Touche, eventually, You see, J got a call from a person close to his most recent ex, (now in S.F.) He had some serious regression in his health and ended up suffering a stroke. Nonetheless, J felt he should go out, celebrate and got himself pretty trashed. Through it all, though I think it was a good distraction and probably good that we could keep an eye on him, because it was pretty clear to J that his ex was not going to make it. (insert specific elements here--suffice to say it was a difficult and pretty tragic story).

Anyhoo, we had a fun time at Touche, and the Jackhammer. However, nothing much was going on in terms of action. We settled for being drunk. Note to Jackhammer: lower the lights in the basement. It's too cheery.

The next day, with all the good, gay intentions we could muster, R and I bailed on the Art Institute, and decided to tour the Steamworks Instititute instead. Curiously, there was no twister inside, as I had been led to believe. We made do, and each met a few friendly locals who could have passed for VanGogh (Kirk Douglas) or someone equally arty like Jackson Pollock. MMMM Ed Harris. Again, I digress.

Returning to our hotel late afternoon, we napped and then later Sat. evening J picked us up in his 1991 Toyota Camry. The curious coincidence of both of us owning near-vintage Camrys was mediated by the fact that his was much closer to the boneyard than mine. Seriously, this baby was a-roaring down Halstead with a hole in the muffler as big as, well, insert your own large hole reference here. J brought a friend, D, along, and the four of us made our way to the Eagle.

F, to be honest, I did not realize there was a lower model version of the Toyota than mine. I have a DX, fer chrissakes. Anyway, this one did not have power windows or a clock. Somehow, that made me feel both better about myself (because my car was better), and yet worse, (since it is still a very old, non-cool car).

OK, back to the narrative.

We get to the Eagle. We have a good time. J took pics. I flirted in the backroom. So did R. Geez, that back bathroom is popular. We left promptly at 3:30, after seeing most of the video best butt contest. A shame that more boys couldn't win. I'm sure they could find some consolation, though, if they only looked around.

Sunday, after church, we had breakfast at the same place you and I ate last summer in Boystown. The name escapes me, but it was yummy. The Huevos Rancheros were nearly as tasty as the young waiter.

Well, except for the nasty 45 min. traffic jam on the way out of town, we cruised on our way home. No, not that way. We got back to R's place around 5 and I got home about an hour later.

I hope your weekend was fun, too.

M

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Two Steps Forward...

One step back.

If the cliche fits, dye it to match. Or something like that.

Maybe it's my age; rather, maybe it's the fact that I have lived through social change. It is not a linear progress.

ENDA will happen, it is a matter of time. I have faith in that much. But whether it is with T and TG or without. That's the step back.

Once, an older black guy said to me, after we had shared/seen a person treated with some serious disrespect. While I seethed, he murmured to me. "It just is."

I wish it were different.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Watching the Detectives

Well, I guess I'm on notice. Or else I'm getting paranoid.

The ENDA post of a few days ago has gotten someone's look in Washington DC. If you track back, you'll see that I asked readers to contact their congressperson to check on their vote. I checked mine, and found out Vern Ehlers voted against it. No real suprise there, Vern is a
Republican and party-line kind of guy.

But, the reason I'm paranoid is that one of the addresses on the sitemap was from the house.gov address. I wonder who it was?

Somebody's watching me!

Monday, November 12, 2007

Craigslist #3?

Craigslist #3 – Trouble ahead

Date: 2007-11-11, 10:33PM ESTProfessional guy seeks college age guys (younger) for trading massages or more. I am a curious and exploring guy and to be honest - like a man's hands on me. I'm 41, 6'1", 225, all man, curious, exploring - more details can be asked for sure. Discretion is a must - total in fact - or no deal. Just two guys being guys, sharing - having fun as guys - no one needs to know. Love a guys scent, smell, even his gear. Sound like you? Tell me about you - and what you are exploring. I have no desire for anal - so don't ask. Be you and be real. I look forward to emailing - and seeing where it leads. So, email me... let me know... tell me about you! I will respond to all inquiries. Have a great week!

All right, bud. I understand your fantasy, but have this to offer. Think back to when you were that college student. Unless you have some daddy issues, you’re probably just some frustrated, overweight (a little) married guy, and really are just a blip on the screen to the average 20 year old. Face it. This ad is not going to work miracles. Sorry to tell ya.

But, you sound very frustrated. You love a man’s scent. You’d like to explore. No anal, though! Don’t even ask!

Good luck, sister. Read between the lines.

HAVE A GREAT WEEK YOURSELF!

Thursday, November 8, 2007

40 votes

Just 40 votes separate us from an ENDA veto override. My congressman, Vern Ehlers, is one of those who needs to change his vote. I sent him a note today. One of many he will receive, I hope, in protest of his narrow-minded view of equality and protection.

We all need to check our representative’s votes and send them a note about our concerns. We owe it to ourselves. We owe it to our brothers and sisters and children. And for those who have gay parents or grandparents or neighbors or friends. For everyone.

It’s the right thing to do. Check out your representative's vote here

http://clerk.house.gov/evs/2007/roll1057.xml

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Little things about smoking I do not miss

I don't miss having to plan ahead for having enough cigarettes for the next 24 hours.

I don't miss having to carry a couple of extra things with me.

I don't miss having to worry about it at all.

I don't miss that I do not have a callous on my thumb, from flicking my bic anymore.

A couple of days ago, I tried to take a count of how many times a day I think about having a cigarette. It's down to 3 or 4 moments/reminders. That's all. No real urge to get back into that pool. As they say, ish.